Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

did it happen???

I woke up in the morning-- feeling flummoxed, had what happened yesterday really happened? Did I really mean all those things I said? How am I going to face him everyday? Ideas swimming through my head, my heart pounding, frightened, bewildered, anxious but also quietly happy that someone could feel those things about me, someone i felt the same about. That rarely happens. Most of my previous relationships have been either me falling in love and not them or vice versa. But it can't happen-- it's just wrong, what would everybody say, I would be vituperated, a pariah, and everything I have worked hard for in my life, all my friends, my family, my reputaion would all be ruined. But what's really important here, if this is love, does all that matter, they say love will conquer all. What if this is it, my one chance, he's the one, that we were meant to be together, but a cruel twist of fate threw us apart, or maybe it was fate that had brought us together. We were indeed a modern day version of romeo and juliet, wanting to be together but knowing our families would do everything in their power to pull us apart if they ever found out. Would this modern love story end in tragedy too? Was this what it felt like for Charles and Camilla? Two people in love, wanting to be together, but family commitments keeping them apart, but that was meant to be, through everything they have been through they are together now, and still in love, what if this was my love story? It's indeed too perplexed but I'm embracing all the consequences that this may entail. It's not his fault or my fault-- it's nobody's fault. We made a promise that all the things that may hamper our way-- we can outdo it. As a title of the song says, against all odds. We'll be strong, no matter what happens not for us, but for our little anaku!...
nhe 032104

Saturday, October 17, 2009

my sentiments

distressing sentiments
invades my head
filled with vanity,
forlornness,
and diffidence
when will it cease? will it ever end?
sad thoughts

kept lachrymation me at heart
im now collapsed into parts
with these visual modality in my mind
when will it stop? will it ever quit?
pitiful thinkings
stop wounding me now
its your retentiveness
that haunts me every night
when will it give up? will it ever LAST...